The Farm
Meme It!Erin:[upon seeing Todd Packer enter the office] Oh, gosh.
Todd Packer:Hey, Moonface. Nice to see those shiny, little Chinese eyes of yours.
Clark:[to Pam] Who's this guy?
Pam: bad.
Todd Packer:Hi, all.
Phyllis:Why are you here, Todd?
Todd Packer:OK. Let's get right to it. I guess. My name is Todd Packer and I am in recovery. I'm working the steps. I'm on step eight of Alcoholics Anonymous and step nine of Narcotics Anonymous. I'm here to make amends. I've been hard to deal with over the past years. Kind of a jerk. I know it. I don't need you to accept my apology, but I'd love it if you did.
Kevin:Packer, we accept. [others disagree]
Todd Packer:Actually, they have a specific way I need to do this. And, I have to go through examples of stuff. OK. Uh, where to begin. [to Pam] Hey. Pam-pam and her pam-pams. Wow. I have said some crude things about those. But, they are beautiful. And, I guess that's why I acted out. Pam, I'm sorry I objectified you. And, personified your breasts. Sorry, guys. [to Phyllis] Oh boy. I have not been nice to you. Philly, I'm sorry for the things I said about your size. To your face, behind your back, and in the form of drawings. Actually, that goes to all you double XLs. Stanley, Kevin, [points to Clark] this kid in a few years.
Pam:Todd, you're just saying insults in the form of an apology.
Todd Packer:Why can't I just be nice? Truth is, I really like you guys. I really do. OK. The apology's just half of it. The big thing is making amends. And, that's why I brought these. I went out to the Steamtown Mall and I got you all cupcakes. From that place 'Nipples'.
Pam:I think it's called 'Nibbles'.
Todd Packer:Huh. The mind sees what it wants to, huh? [hands cupcake to Erin] There you go.
Pam:Hey, hey, guys. Wait. Before we accept these cupcakes, I think we need to have a conversation privately in the conference room. Don't eat the cupcake.