Christmas Wishes
Meme It!Andy:Well, I hate to have to take my Santa hat off, and put on my hard ass hat. [puts on baseball cap that has a foam rear-end on it with the words HARD ASS] But, this is serious. It's come to my attention that somebody who shall remain nameless, wants to switch desk clumps.
Dwight:Fine with me. Jim can leave anytime he wants. Goodbye.
Jim:It wasn't me.
Andy:It wasn't either of you.
Jim:Kathy wants to leave our clump?
Andy:Sh sh sh sh! Don't look. Who it was is not important...but she did say that your constant pranking and one-upsmanship is driving her crazy. She or he.
Dwight:I just wanna say, this is not my fault. OK? The weak always bully the strong. Contrary to what you see in the media. I am always acting in self-defense. Occasionally preemptive self-defense. [punches Jim in the arm]
Jim:Ow, What are you doing? [Jim fights back]
Andy:Hey! Hey! Respect the hat!
Jim:Pam never seemed to have a problem with us.
Andy:Alright. I'm gonna speak in a language you both understand....Mo-nay.
Jim:What was that?
Dwight:What is it?
Andy:Money....You both have sizable Christmas bonuses coming your way. If I catch either of you messing with the other, I will give both bonuses to the other person.
Jim:Can't do that.
Dwight:No, absolutely not.
Andy:You need consequences. OK? I want you both walking on eggshells.