Secret Santa
Meme It!Phyllis:This just arrived from the Dunder Mifflin North Pole branch!
Dwight:We don't have a North Pole branch. Idiot. [grabs package]
Michael:[on karaoke microphone] Uh oh, what's Dwight gonna get? What is iiiit?
Dwight:Yes! [Dwight opens package to reveal another machine part]
Michael:Oh yes. It's space garbage. Dwight's gonna be able to build himself a friend! [sings] Deck the halls with crappy gifts...
Phyllis:Ho ho ho! For Stanley! Ho ho ho! You've been very good this year -
Stanley:I have.
Michael:[on microphone] Yeah, except for cheating on your wife. Adultery's a sin, look it up in the Bible people. What'd you get?
Kevin:He got scented candles!
Michael:[on microphone] Oh, that's appropriate. Lot of fire where you're going. Better get used to it. You're going to H-E-L-L double hockey sticks. You're going to Hell Stanley.
Angela:Amen.
Phyllis:And this brings us to you, little one.
Michael:[on microphone] I can't see from here people. Somebody shout it out, don't make me get up.
Angela:It's fabric! I really wanted this.
Michael:[on microphone] That's fantastic. You can make another dress that goes past your feet.
Angela:Andy, is this you?
Michael:[on microphone] No!
Phyllis:It's a secret.
Michael:[on microphone] Andy had Erin.
Andy:Nnnnya.
Michael:[on microphone] What? Was I not supposed to say it? [Jim unplugs mic] What? Turn it back on.
Jim:No. [Michael gets up and walks into his office]