Michael's Last Dundies
Meme It!Michael:[all in conference room] Guys! I want you to help us work on some banter.
Kevin:Yes! I love banter. But I hate witty banter.
Michael:Here we go! So, DeAngelo! You and I have a lot in common. You lost two hundred pounds, and I lose my car keys every morning.
Deangelo:That is true, we do share some similarities. I know how you can fix one of those problems, for me it was portion control. For you, you need a key chain. Maybe one with a-
Michael:[cutting him off] Okay, okay. You know what, I didn't actually lose my keys...
Deangelo:This did not happen.
Michael:Mmmmkay. There needs to be what you call a rat-a-tat. And right now it's all rat and no tat. Ryan come on up here. Tap DeAngelo out. Just watch this. Okay. [Ryan stands next to Michael up front] Ryan how are you today?
Ryan:Why don't you ask my therapist, my mom certainly pays her enough.
Michael:[very excited] There you go! Lovely! Regis and Kelly! Nice! Use that as an inspiration. Just be funny.
Deangelo:Uhhh, you sir! [points to Jim] Are we having fun tonight?
Jim:Having a great time.
Deangelo:Oh good!
Jim:Thanks, yeah.
Deangelo:Where were you on September 11th?
Michael:No! God! [Jim looks at him oddly]
Deangelo:This is so weird! If I'm conducting a meeting, good to go. But if I think of it as a performance... I-I fall apart. Obviously.
Andy:Why don't you think of hosting the Dundies like you're just running a meeting.
Michael:No, no, no! This is the performance of your life!
Jim:Why don't you just, privately, in your own head, think of it like a meeting.
Michael:Jim, please no loopholes.
Darryl:Mike, why do you have to control how he perceives it in his mind?
Michael:This is my last Dundies ever, if I want mind control over him, is that too much to ask?