The Promotion
Meme It!Michael:You know, there's no easy way to do this. I say we add 1.5% to their paychecks and don't say anything about it.
Jim:Do you mean, like break-in in the middle of the night and change the numbers on payroll?
Michael:No, we can do it during the day. It doesn't have to be that dramatic, Jim.
Jim:Okay. You know what would help is a pros and cons list for our options.
Michael:Jim, don't take this the wrong way. Are you gonna take this the wrong way?
Jim:It's hard to tell so far.
Michael:You use your brain too much.
Jim:I'm sorry, are you advocating that I use it less?
Michael:Sometimes the smartest people don't think at all.
Jim:You just came up with that.
Michael:As I was saying it.
Jim:Yeah. Okay, so for the 1.5% increase, pro-- everyone gets a little bit.
Michael:[in nerdy voice] Con-- you look like a nerd.
Jim:Con-- no one gets as much as they did last year.
Michael:Pro-- you get to share your pros and cons list with the other nerds.
Jim:Pro-- no favoritism.
Michael:Con-- you unzip your pants, and you find that there's a calculator down there.