Grief Counseling
Meme It!Michael:[as Pam returns to conference room] Okay, we can start. Um...
Pam:You waited for me?
Michael:Yeah. Pam, you're a member of this family. So we will wait for our family members. Phyllis, you wanna give it a shot?
Dwight:[grabbing ball] I got it. When my mother was pregnant with me, they did an ultrasound and found she was having twins. When they did another ultrasound a few weeks later, they discovered, that I had resorbed the other fetus. Do I regret this? No. I believe his tissue has made me stronger. I now have the strength of a grown man and a little baby.
Michael:Okay, why don't you throw the ball to somebody else.
Stanley:[throwing ball back] Nope.
Michael:[returning ball to Stanley] Oh, yes Stanley. Come on. Your turn, you have to go.
Stanley:I will NOT. [throws ball back]
Michael:Okay... I'm going to toss the ball to Pam.
Pam:Let's see. I had an aunt that I was really close to. She was this amazing female boxer. Um, anyway, she was injured in a fight, and she was paralyzed. So, you can imagine how upset I was when I found out that she asked her manager to remove her breathing tube so she could die.
Michael:Wow. If you wanna cry, that's okay.
Ryan:[catching ball] Thanks. Um, a few years ago, my family was on a safari in Africa and, um, my cousin, Mufasa was um, he was trampled to death by a pack of wildebeests and, um, we all... took it really hard. All of us kind of in the audience of what happened.
Michael:Do you want to talk about it anymore?
Ryan:Oh, it would probably take me like an hour and a half to tell that whole story.
Kevin:Me, me, me, me, me me. [catches ball] Yes. Okay, um. I was trying to throw this party once. And everyone was over for the weekend. And then my uncle Bernie died, and so me and my best friend, we had to pretend like he was alive, so...
Michael:Wait a second. That's Weekend at Bernie's. [upset] Do you think that this is a game?
Phyllis:Well, there is a ball.
Michael:All right, we're starting over.
Stanley:No, I'm done.
Michael:You are not leaving. No! We are not done.
Angela:We really have a lot of work to do right now.
Michael:Yeah. Well, you know what? The guy who had my job has died. And nobody cares! And he sat at my desk. [breaking down]
Toby:Michael, look. I know this is hard for you, but death's just a part of life. I mean, just this morning I saw a little bird fly into the glass doors downstairs and die. And I had to keep going.
Michael:How do you know?
Toby:What?
Michael:That that bird was dead? Did you check its breathing?
Toby:It was obvious...
Michael:Was its heart beating, Toby? Did you check it? No, of course you didn't. You're not a veterinarian. You don't know ANYTHING! [runs out of conference room crying]
Dwight:Michael! [following Michael downstairs] Michael. Michael ...
Michael:[seeing bird] Oh, God!
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