Safety Training
Meme It!Michael:Toby now has the floor... and he is going to try not to screw this up, like everything else in his life. Let me rephrase that. I believe that you can do safety training and make it sound just as good as Darryl. Here we go!
Toby:Ok, um, one thing that you're gonna want to look out for is carpal tunnel syndrome. It's recommended that you take a ten minute break from typing every hour. For your circulation, you're gonna want to get up out of your chairs and uh, and move around about ten minutes every hour.
Michael:Yes, good. Fine. Like stretching and...
Toby:Um, yeah. You're computer screen can be a big strain on your eyes, so uh, it's also recommended that you step away for about... about ten minutes every hour.
Michael:Wow, that is... that time really adds up. That's like... a half an hour, every hour?
Darryl:Take them at the same time.
Michael:Ok, you know what? You're making it sound kind of lame. So, skip ahead to the really dangerous stuff. Like sometimes computers can explode, can they not?
Toby:No, no. Um, you always want to keep a sweater or cardigan of some sort, in case it gets drafty.
Ryan:What about a long sleeve T?
Toby:Well, that'll work.
Kevin:Long johns? A shaw?
Toby:You know, anything that warms you.
Michael:Ok, you know what? I think that everybody is going to vomit due to boredom. [to warehouse guys] Sorry, he is very lame. [takes book from Toby] Um, let's see. 'Seasonal affective disorder! A depression that includes weight gain, fatigue, irritability, brought on by the low light of winter.'
Darryl:Thank God we only had a baler to deal with.
Lonny:Yeah, that dim light is a bitch, ain't it?
Michael:Ok guys, you know what? I didn't--- I didn't interrupt when you were having your presentation.
Darryl:Actually, you did.
Michael:Yes. Okay, let's do another one. This is a good one. 'A particular concern for office workers is a sedimentary life style, which can contribute---'
Toby:Sedentary.
Michael:Yes. 'Which can contribute to heart disease.' Heart disease kills more people that balers.
Lonny:That's called having a fat butt, Michael.
Michael:Mmmm, no, no, it's... sedentary...
Lonny:Yeah, yeah. That's, that's fat butt disease. That's what you suffer from?
Michael:No.
Lonny:Fat butt disease, Michael?
Kelly:Excuse me, sea monster, you weigh like a thousand pounds.
Lonny:Yeah? I bet you'd like to swim with this sea monster, wouldn't you?
Kelly:Ryan?
Lonny:Dude, tell your girl to shut up.
Kelly:What?!
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